There I was, sitting on my couch on October 3rd, ready to listen to the newly released Taylor Swift album, The Life of a Showgirl. After my disappointment at her last album, The Tortured Poet’s Department – an album I felt was long-winded, lyrically nonsensical at points, and lacking on the production front — I was excited to see where Taylor was going to take this album, both sonically and lyrically.
Imagine my shock while listening to the album’s seventh track, “Actually Romantic.” After hearing the lyric “wrote me a song saying it makes you sick to see my face,” I knew the song was directed at singer-songwriter Charli xcx; a quick online search confirmed my suspicion. I’ve been an Angel since freshman year, a Swiftie since my childhood. This diss track made me, in one word, distraught.
Charli xcx and Taylor Swift’s rather tense relationship is not a new discovery. Swift invited xcx to open for her 2018 Reputation Stadium Tour; after the tour ended, xcx controversially commented that opening for Swift’s tour felt like “waving at five-year-olds.” Swift did not respond to this comment, and the tensions were settled – until 2024. Both xcx and Swift completed album cycles – brat and The Tortured Poet’s Department, respectively — in 2024. On the release day of Swift’s new album, xcx tweeted “sympathy is a knife;” this would end up being the title of a track on brat.
“Sympathy is a knife” is confirmed to be at least somewhat about Taylor Swift, but it isn’t a diss track. Rather, it is a vulnerable track, one where xcx reveals her feelings of inferiority when comparing herself to artists like Swift: “I couldn’t even be you if I tried/I’m opposite, I’m on the other side.” As xcx rose to the mainstream music scene after the release of brat, she found herself feeling more and more insecure when putting herself next to other pop stars–especially Swift. This track is an ode to those feelings; xcx is not critiquing Swift but is rather critiquing herself.
Swift, however, took this song personally, believing it to be a diss track. Her feelings on the matter erupted, and like most of her complicated feelings, she took to writing a song about them. “Actually Romantic” is Swift’s declaration that xcx’s “critique” of her isn’t hateful but is actually romantic. The song’s overarching claim is that she is flattered by the amount of time xcx spends thinking, talking, and writing about her.
Considering the majority-negative reactions to The Life of a Showgirl by haters and fans alike, this song is one of the most well-received on the album by Swifties. SHS sophomore and Taylor Swift fan Emmalyn Culbert remarked, “It was absolutely beautiful. I really loved it. She’s staying true to herself, and it’s very different…but I really love that song.”
Personally, I don’t really feel one way or the other about the song sonically; I was more focused on the lyrics. Now, if this response was just about “Sympathy is a knife,” I would be a lot more inclined to take Charli xcx’s side. Honestly, Swift even bringing up this song in “Actually Romantic” doesn’t make sense to me; “Sympathy is a knife” is more of an expression of xcx’s insecurities, and she completely acknowledges that Swift has the leg-up when it comes to fame and popularity, erasing the possibility of interpreting the song as a diss track. In this regard, “Actually Romantic” is a rather embarrassing misinterpretation of what xcx is trying to say: that no matter how hard she tries, she will never reach the same level of fame as Swift.
Joe Larkin, SHS senior and one of the biggest Charli xcx stans (super fan) I know, agreed that Swift “most definitely” misunderstood the message of “Sympathy is a knife.” SHS freshman Yan Dos Santos, a fan of both Swift and xcx, agreed as well, stating that “‘Sympathy is a knife’ is just talking about how people thought of Charli wrong.” Both agreed that the song is not a direct insult to Swift and is generally critiquing xcx herself.
However, when listening to Swift’s diss, it is clear that there is something else going on behind the scenes. Fans already knew that Charli xcx was far from pleased when Taylor Swift and Matty Healey officially started dating; Matty Healey is in the same band – The 1975 — as xcx’s now-husband, George Daniel. Clearly, Swift stepping into a larger role in xcx’s life during this romantic relationship only amplified xcx’s insecurities. In “Sympathy is a knife,” xcx laments, “Don’t want to see you backstage at my boyfriend’s show/fingers crossed behind my back, I hope they break up quick.”
Swift and Healey underwent a messy breakup in 2024, a breakup that would become the central theme of most songs on The Tortured Poet’s Department. This theme shocked the majority of Swifties — including me — who were expecting the majority of the album to centralize around the end of Swift’s six-year relationship with British actor Joe Alwyn. Even knowing how painful this relationship was for Swift, xcx still chose to continue her friendship with Matty Healey.
It’s clear that this friendship includes significant gossip about Taylor Swift; somehow, Swift found out about this gossip’s occurrence, citing it in the lyrics, “I heard you call me ‘Boring Barbie’ when the coke’s got you brave/high fived my ex and then you said you’re glad he ghosted me.” Indeed, In July of 2023, Matty Healey had dinner with Charli xcx and posted a “To Do List” on his socials, a list that included “Break up with Margot Robbie.” Robbie famously played Barbie in the 2023 summer blockbuster of the same name; when putting the pieces together, it is clear that xcx was encouraging Healey to break up with Swift, calling her “Boring Barbie” in the process.
All of this news and new tensions between two of my favorite artists leaves me feeling extremely conflicted. Do I pick a side? Honestly, my answer to that question is a resounding “no.” It is so clear when looking at the history of xcx and Swift’s relationship that the majority of the tensions arise from their own insecurities. Both of them want what the other has: Taylor Swift wants to be as cool as Charli xcx, and Charli xcx wants to be as popular as Taylor Swift. However, no matter how hard either of these women try, they will not achieve the same level of coolness or popularity as the other — a sad, but true, fact.
The reason I won’t pick a side? I don’t think it’s rational or necessary to even compare these women to each other, in terms of looking for similarities. Yes, they are both female music artists. Yes, they were both nominated for the same Grammy (Album of the Year) in 2025, and neither of them won it. That said, their musical styles and careers are near polar opposites.
Charli xcx, at her core, is a hyperpop artist; even though brat was a cultural phenomenon, the hyperpop influences are extremely clear when listening to the album, and the music itself is still far from being as digestible as some of Swift’s albums. Swift, at her core, is a pop artist, one who has created excellent and easily digestible music. This digestibility is part of the reason why she is the biggest artist in the world; the general public can easily enjoy bops like “Blank Space” and “Anti-Hero,” whereas xcx songs like “Everything is romantic” and “anthems” require much more energy to listen to, explaining why xcx has a smaller fanbase.
Let’s compare Swift’s and xcx’s lives in 2024; at the same time Swift was performing at sold-out stadiums on her record-breaking Eras Tour, xcx was DJing packed underground clubs in Ibiza, sunglasses on, drink in hand. This comparison makes it easy to understand the jealousy within their relationship. As hard as xcx tries, she will never be popular enough to sell out stadium after stadium on a 21-month-long tour; as hard as Swift tries, she will never be cool enough to DJ an underground club in Ibiza with sunglasses on. This jealousy is only further proof of how comparing these two women does not make sense. They are two completely different artists, living completely different lives, with barely anything in common.
In the end, those invested in the relationship of these two talented women need to understand that they cannot be rationally compared outside of analyzing their tense history. They don’t occupy the same realm of pop music; they are both too jealous of each other to make amends; their personalities do not clash well. Neither of them are completely in the wrong, and neither of them acted in the most mature way throughout the course of their relationship. Because of the stark differences between Swift and xcx, I believe that there is no chance that this beef will ever be settled; they bring out the worst in each other because of their deep-rooted insecurities, insecurities that are only made worse when interacting with each other.
Two of the three fans I interviewed are also choosing not to pick a side. “I’m gonna see what happens,” Culbert commented, while Dos Santos added, “Yeah, I like both.” However, Larkin immediately sided with xcx when asked which side he was on: “I don’t really like Taylor Swift in general…Charli xcx is better.”
With that said, this will be my first and last analysis of the beef between Charli xcx and Taylor Swift. As the internet explodes over this feud, I find myself thinking that looking too deeply into this relationship is a waste of time. Honestly, it’s not as complicated as the internet portrays it to be; this eight-year-long relationship boils down to two girls who don’t enjoy each other’s company because of their misdirected insecurities.
Will xcx release a response? Will Swift open up more about the situation? Will the two work it out on the remix? All I know is that xcx and Swift will remain two of my favorite artists, no matter the circumstances.